In Fear and Faith

26 02 2008

The madness has begun. I spent a better part of my night last night preparing my resumé for the job search. Today I applied for about 7 jobs, and I’m sure that’s just the tip of the iceberg. I also scheduled my CT boards, for which I got audited, adding to the stress of it all. Once I get applications in at more places, the real fun begins.

 I absolutely hate waiting. I am probably the most impatient person I know. When I want something, I want it now and I don’t usually consider or care much at what cost. I do know that waiting to hear back for an interview, and if I’m fortunate to be offered a position, is going to kill me. I know the stress of taking my boards and waiting to hear if I passed not only the exam but the audit as well is going to leave me with the shortest nails a human can possibly have.

 I have a good job in Pittsburgh. I have friends and family here. And yet I’m about to give that all up. For love. This past weekend in Chicago confirmed to me that is where I’m meant to be. Pittsburgh is who I was, but it is not me anymore. Chicago is. And even though I’m scared of all these changes about to happen, I’m ready. Life is too short not to be happy, so I’m no longer waiting for opportunities to come to me. I’m going to be solely responsible for my happiness.

So wish me luck in the upcoming few months, I’m sure as hell going to need it.  


Uncertain Certainties

20 02 2008

Once in a while, it’s nice to know you’re appreciated. It’s nice to know you’ve done something to be proud of and sometimes you get the acknowledgement you deserve. I would like to publicly congratulate my very good friend and confidant Mark Condupa. Mark is about to see all his dreams realized.

A little background info: Mark has been a close friend of mine for years. I’m not sure exactly when our friendship began, and I’m not sure he he knows either. The important thing is that our friendship has strong roots. Mark was always the realist, he saw things as they were and called them out. Maybe that’s why I liked him so much. Throughout the years this has never changed. He’s still the same hopeless romantic wiseass he always was. But in many ways, he’s changed.

As we’ve grown up, we’ve started to realize who we are and who we’re going to become. At the beginning of 2008, we both made resolutions. Even though I encouraged him, Mark seemed uncertain that his resolutions would come to be. As the days progressed into the new year, he began to see things as I saw them: optimistic. He had three great job potentials in New York, LA, and Chicago. Knowing what a brilliant person Mark is, I knew he would land one of them. Obviously I was rooting for him to get the job in Chicago since I’m heading there,  but I’d be thrilled for him no matter what.

Mark’s other uncertainty: Love. Isn’t that the greatest uncertainty of all? After seeing the risk and lengths I took for love, and then saw how happy I was, Mark also took a chance. And with the results I had predicted. It was worth the risk.

So only eight weeks into the new year, Mark landed the job in New York and the girl. I chuckle when I think of how he doubted me when I said, “Just wait, this is the year for great things.” Who said dreams don’t come true?

Mark, I am so proud of you. You’ve done well, its time to leave the suburban dreams behind and live the big city life. You’ve inspired me to do what you’re doing. Don’t ever lose focus of what you want. You know how to get it. Just have confidence that you deserve it. Your mom would be so proud of who you’ve grown up to be. Congratulations once again on everything, you deserve it.

Mark’s blog can be found here. He’s a wonderful writer, I encourage everyone to check it out.

Valentine’s Day-The aftermath

15 02 2008

Img src: xkcd

I’ve never been one to get into the spirit of Valentine’s Day. Not because I’m single, or a hater, or no fun. It’s simply because I don’t see a reason to designate a day to tell someone you love them. Love is a gift that should be given every day. I read that once on a fortune.

On a lighter note, Twitter added a cute/annoying “feature” today. This new feature allows you to “heart” someone. Not sure if this is going to be a permanent feature, or just something fun for the spirit of Valentines Day. It looks like this:

Cute, but also annoying when your Twitterstream is full of these hearts.

It was quite an interesting morning on Twitter with friends spreading the love all around. My good friend Richard, being the charming guy he is, even dedicated his 17,000th tweet to us girls of Twitter with a special message:

So wereyou feeling the love? I know I was.

What’s this?! Snow?!

12 02 2008

This morning I woke up to a good 2 inches of snow outside. This is nothing new for Pennsylvania, but it’s the first time this winter we’ve got more than a few snowflakes.

 As adults we rarely get snow days like we did when we were kids. In fact, I can’t remember the last time I had a snow day. I think the last time was in 2005 when, in the midst of an ice storm, I got my car stuck in a ditch at the end of my street.

So I was wondering, if we got a snow day what would we do with it? Would we take the time to do the boring chores we had been putting off? Or would we take advantage and use the time to play and have fun?

I would love to think I would sleep in, build an igloo outside, and drink some hot chocolate with marshmallows. Just like I did when I was a kid.


11 02 2008

Update on the Twitter crisis: I woke up this afternoon to a stream of txts from Twitter!!

Although this pleased me, I was also confused since I deleted my number and had not tried to reactivate it since the failed attempts this morning. So of course I log onto Twitter and reactivate my number and SUCCESS!

I am overjoyed.All is well once again in the universe. There will be no ugly divorce.


Breaking up?!?

11 02 2008

Everyone who knows me knows how much I love Twitter. Its the perfect way of communicating things to your friends in 140 characters or less. But one of the main reasons I love Twitter so much is because I can do many things via SMS like send updates, receive friends’ updates, direct messages and so forth. This is probably the feature I love the most about Twitter because even if I can’t be in front of the computer 24/7, I am still updated as to what is going on while I’m away. 

Sure, sometimes all those updates can get annoying, but to be honest the SMS updates are what keeps me from using other platforms such as Jaiku and Pownce more readily.

So, what is with the title breaking up if all I’m doing is raving about their service? Well, here’s the thing: Twitter has been having a lot of problems lately, causing many avid users like myself many frustrations. In the past few days Twitter has been seeming to be more on track. I thought these frustrations were drawing to a close until today, when I deleted my mobile number from the SMS updates. I did this mainly because I thought maybe if I deleted it and then reactivated it, I would solve the SMS issues I was having. I ended up creating more of a headache. Instead of a quick reactivation like I had hoped for, I am now unable to reactivate my number for reasons unknown. I have attempted several times, with different verification codes with no success. I’m stressed: I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I can’t stop worrying about not getting updates (okay exaggerating just a little there). 

So I do the next logical thing. I cry and stomp my feet and email Twitter Support for help. So now I keep my fingers crossed and pray to the Twitter gods to please be kind and give me back my SMS updates.

So now comes the even more frustrating, agonizing part: waiting. Will I get my SMS updates back or will I be forced to break up with Twitter as I keep threatening? After all, wouldn’t I be crazy to stay in a relationship in which I was no longer happy?

Twitter, if I can’t have you with SMS updates despite your quirks, then maybe I don’t want you at all. 

I’ve had it up to here

9 02 2008

In the midst of all this new-found positivity, I digress and find myself having an all too familiar “Raging Bitch” day. These days usually begin with me waking up in a foul mood and continue on until I am safely asleep in my bed once again sometime later. On these days, no one is exempt from my irritability and may be subject to it at any point that our paths may cross.

In an effort to put my irritations out of sight/out of mind I’m compiling a short list and hopefully purging myself of these bad vibes.

The following are things that have displeased me at some point in the past twenty-four hours:

-Waking up from a bad dream and having that be the beginning of my day

-Driving in Pittsburgh traffic. For such a small city, there sure are enough jerks on the road to go around. While I’m on the topic, drivers who panic at the first snowflake. AND DRIVE SLOWER THAN MY 75 YEAR OLD GRANDFATHER.

-Doctors who make mistakes, then attempt to cover up their mistakes by trying to belittle you. I don’t play games. If you’re wrong, I’m going to tell you that you’re wrong. I don’t care if the title at the end of your name is more prestigious than mine.

-My brother and his friends. These two are a dangerous combination that intertwine many emotions of mine. None of those emotions are in any way good for my blood pressure.  Part of my animosity towards them comes from being jealous of them not having responsibilities. The other part is just annoyed at their juvenile behaviour.

-and last, but certainly not least, my job. True, I actually like what I do, its just all the bullshit that comes along with the territory that has my blood boiling at the moment.

Okay, now I’m going to take a deep breath, go to sleep and hope that when I wake up I will be back to myself again. I don’t like wasting time on being negative when there’s so much I’m so excited about in my life right now.

If I wake up and I’m still stuck in the rampage mode, anyone have some valium?